found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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