All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
