So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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