ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
