Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
