i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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