This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
