I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Randomize
