I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
