I could have mohawked her pubes.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
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