can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
