I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
