I molested 6 butterflies tonight
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
