OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
