Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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