? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
