The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
