Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
