What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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