I like to think it a success when the cops are called
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Randomize
