About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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