Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
