your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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