Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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