just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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