thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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