never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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