apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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