I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
