She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
my sisters under your porch take her home
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
