I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
