Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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