No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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