whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
should my penis look like a turkey
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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