yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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