I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
so let's talk penis.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize