im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
