honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
