Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
