yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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