hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
is that a dick in a sweater?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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