If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
