I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
