Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
