You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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