Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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