I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize
