You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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