Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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