Did you just see the Batmobile???
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
My breath smells like gin and sadness
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
